When did I become such a worrier? Is it a symptom  of increasing age  or have I always fretted about things? I do feel that we all worry more since the Covid pandemic started and we had to endure the enforced isolation of the lockdowns. The Daily Newspapers are full of doom, gloom and despondency. Apparently sensational stories sell newspapers. So why do I even buy a daily paper? That is easy: I have the local rag delivered for the puzzle page. I sip my first cup of tea of the day pondering the nine letters of the “Codewheel”, wracking my brains for words of 4 letters or more and trying to work out the word that may be formed by using all 9 letters. Then, after making my second cuppa, I move onto the “Codeword”  puzzle. If my day is not unduly busy I will tackle the Cryptic Crossword and the Sudoku after doing the NY Times “Wordle”  puzzle. I feel quite bereft at weekends, when there is no newspaper – although there is still  “Wordle”.t is a good job that there is only  ONE Wordle puzzle set each day by the NY Times – otherwise I would be spending far too much time on it.

We do not stop doing things because we’re growing old. No! We grow old because we stop doing things. One of the unforeseen consequences of the first “lockdown” was the restriction on ‘going out’. I  had not taken a train since the first outbreak back in March 2020 and now I am so anxious about train travel. Why? Goodness  knows! And it is not about the risk of catching Covid –  as I understand it, that risk is with us all the time because  the virus is airborne. No. It is the fear of not being able to get up or down the step into the train compartment combined with the fear of not being able to lower myself onto or lever myself up off my train seat. My fears are made worse by the fact that my joints are getting stiffer. So, the other day I HAD to catch a local train to meet a friend. I promised myself that if there was a problem I would abandon the train travel plan and just splash out and take a taxi. 

What happened? Nothing! – of course. I bought my ticket, boarded the train, sat down – albeit a bit  stiffly – then got up again and disembarked at my destination. Bingo! What on earth was I so worried about? I was reminded of the “Serenity Prayer” which was written by Reinhold Niebuhr (1892 to 1971):-

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference.”

Every time I find myself sliding into depressive thoughts and/ or conversations about the current state of affairs I must recite Niebuhr’s words.

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